Ted movie review - Aussieboyreviews


The film is filled with coarse language, sexual references, drugs, partying, as well as a sense of light heart and sweetness. Don’t be fooled into having a family movie night with this hard-partying, potty-mouthed, constantly drunk and horny teddy bear.


John’s childhood wish comes true when his teddy bear is brought to life. But now that he is an adult, he must decide between spending time with the bear, Ted, or committing to his relationship with his girlfriend, Lori.

Movie Images

Movie details

Director: Seth MacFarlane
Cast: Mark Wahlberg, Seth MacFarlane, Mila Kunis, Joel McHale, Giovanni Ribisi, Jessica Barth, Patrick Stewart, Aedin Mincks
Writer: Seth MacFarlane, Alec Sulkin, Wellesley Wild
Release Date (Australia): 5 July 2012
Runtime: 106 minutes/1h 46m
Genre: Comedy
Country: USA
Language: English

CONTENT GUIDE (warning: May contain spoilers)

Themes (M)

The film contains themes in the form of crude humour.

Violence (M)

The film includes a scene of moderate comedic violence in which a man is accidentally stabbed in the hand, accompanied by blood detail. There are also punches, slaps and scuffles.

Coarse Language (MA15+)

The film contains a single use of the word “c**t” and frequent use of the words “f**k”, “s**t”, “ass”, “**shole”, “p***y” and “bitch”.

Drug Use (MA15+)

The film includes verbal drug references and scenes of drug use, including the use of bongs, marijuana and cocaine. 

Nudity (M)

The film features a brief scenes of female breasts nudity and male buttocks nudity.

Sex (MA15+)

The film features strong crude sexual references, crude sexual gestures and use of the word “f**k” in a sexual context.

mpaa rating

R (for crude and sexual content, pervasive language, and some drug use)

Aussie boy's thoughts

Don’t be fooled into letting this hard-partying, foul-mouthed, frequently-drinking teddy bear be the next choice for your family movie night. It feels like the main goal of this movie was to take the kind of concept you’d only expect in a children’s movie, where a young boy makes a wish that brings his teddy bear to life, and stuff it with over-the-top vulgarness to make an adult comedy. Ted is an absolutely hilarious movie, but the idea unfortunately leaves with a flaw that will bother some more than others.

Mark Wahlberg plays a man who often spends his days at his work, or smoking pot with his lifelong best friend, Ted, voiced by Seth MacFarlane. The film begins with a very clever and engaging opening in which Patrick Stewart as the narrator introduces us to this child whose teddy bear has come to life, and then jumps what looks like around 20 years later to where this child is now a grown man using bongs and swearing with Ted, whose voice has deepened from when he first comes to life with a squeaky voice. Wahlberg is also presently faced with the choice to sticking to hanging out with his best friend, or committing to his relationship with his girlfriend, who Mila Kunis is casted perfectly as.

Ted will keep its older teen and adult audiences entertained through its light heart, comedy and sweetness. But know that this is an extremely profane movie loaded with sex, drugs, language and crude humour you wouldn’t want your children seeing. Crass comedy is an immediate turn-off for a lot of people, but those who enjoy the mature jokes may be bothered by the fact that the story is just too childish to enjoy as an adult comedy. The main characters call themselves “thunder-buddies” because Wahlberg is terrified of storms, there’s a plot involving a child and his father who want to kidnap the talking bear as their own, and there’s not a crap-ton of success in the emotional substance it provides. It’s a comedy about making choices and prioritising certain relationships.

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